February 2012
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I wish I was a mermaid. Then I would just swim underwater all day and swim as fast as I could to the corners of the ocean so I could truly escape the world. It would be so peaceful.
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I really really really miss my friend. I’m not going to see her for another 2 months, which is really hard because she understands a lot of my nonsense. She knows when I’m sincerely sad or happy, and can always tell when I’m lying. She doesn’t push aside my thoughts/feelings when something is truly bothering me and she talks to me about her life, which is harder for certain...
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And You Feel Like Falling Down. I'll Carry You...
Tonight. We are young. So let’s set the world on fire. We can burn brighter than the sun.
This song is stuck in my head. Mostly because I’ve been hardcore listening to it for half an hour. My goal is to get through this week semi-peacefully. I feel so tense lately. It’s kind of crazy. I guess I’m just a bit more crazy than usual. I honestly just need an outlet for things....
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I don't love you but I always will
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I feel like my friend is leaving me when I need her the most. And I don’t blame her and I’m not mad. I’m just extremely extremely sad and feeling lost.
Do you ever feel like you’re meant for some type of greatness in life? But then it never happens…and things start to get worse and worse? Well, that’s kind of similar to how I feel
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I wish I could bring simlicity into my life.
Just when you start to think people understand you, whether in school or work or life or your home, you have a moment with them and realize they don’t even know you at all. Not the slightest sometimes. And it just makes you really sad, because you know everything about them.
So I actually saw a cute guy today,
& He was a douche bag! Like definition of a narcissistic, good-looking male who thinks he’s god’s gift to girls. That does not give me a good feeling about the rest of the actually good-looking male population. Are they seriously all like that? Because I don’t mean to be judgmental or anything, but I don’t think a public workplace is the right environment to be talking...
Out of the loop
So I only work weekends & no days during the week. Well this is like the third time I’ve had to go to work, and something has drastically changed! Like people getting fired type of stuff. Work is going to get especially lame if we keep letting all the fun people go…
Maybe it’ll all work out. & Maybe it won’t. But it would just be stupid for me to give up. That’s like letting the universe win, and I realize that now. You know, love happens when it happens. I’m not going to be one of those people who pretends the feeling is there, or rushed something, or any other crap like that. Maybe by waiting, it’ll only make it so much...
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Do you believe in love?
I use to. I use to think yeah why not, it’ll happen one day. But not anymore. It’s false. I don’t believe in anything at all anymore. Whatever happens, happens. Soul mates are a lie, fate is for idiots, and love is for the biggest idiots of all. Honestly, I have no experiences or things I’ve witnessed to show me otherwise.
We’re all just living one big, fact,...
If I die alone, I really don’t think I’ll forgive the universe. It’s kind of a slap in the face.